A Perfect Fit

You know, I never really had a formal rite of passage, so I'm starting to make plans for one in a couple years. You can probably guess why I would like to have one, say, in October of 2011.

Anyway, until that fateful event, I think I'll take a cue from my friend Katherine, who flew to Paris earlier this year and had herself fitted for the penultimate bra, by this legendary lingerie design house. Katherine wrote about the experience for More magazine, and last time I was in New York, she showed me that bra. At first glance, you might think it's not much different than anything you might buy off the rack, especially some of the more high-end brands.

But then, when you look closer, you realize the stitching is impeccable, and the quality of the material is unmatched in any department store. It was so light and film-y, it was like cradling a whisper. Yet somehow, it was so architecturally sound, you come to understand that this item was designed exclusively for one woman. Every detail, down to length and width of straps, type of clasp, curve of the cups, was meant specifically for Katherine, and just wouldn't do a thing for the next woman who might walk up to the rack and try it on.

I am TOTALLY determined to have that experience during my 50th year of life. Right along with the tummy tuck and getting my eye-bags hoovered. But until then, I've found the next best transformational rite of passage: tailored blue jeans.

You see, throughout my entire life, I can only remember one time that a pair of off-the-rack jeans fit me almost perfectly. They were from Banana Republic, a shop I had steadfastly avoided until my friend Marcy insisted I could find a pair there. I had always dismissed stores like BR and Anne Taylor because the few times I entered, every item screamed "Only 20-Somethings With No Hips Allowed; May We Show You Something In an Exit Sign?"

The saddest part is that when I was a 20-something with no hips, I was way too traditional and boring to shop for trendy clothes. In fact, I've really only started getting into fashion within the past decade. I can even pin-point the exact dawn of my fashion consciousness---Post 9/11, when I truly embraced the twin concepts of "tomorrow is not promised," and "cleavage is there for a reason...use it."

Anyway, that pair of Size 6R Banana Republic Jeans were a real revelation for me. As a child, I never had brand new clothing, and learned to sew to either make my own simple designs, or to adequately cobble together hand-me-downs or thrift store bargains. Those Banana Republic jeans were the perfect length, not too tight through the thighs, and had no gaps at the waist, which I'd always endured with blue jeans thanks to a near life-long bubble butt. I was SO thrilled, I paid full price for those suckas, something I rarely do.

The only other time I paid full price for a pair of jeans was during another New York trip, when I noticed a Diesel store across the street from my "temple"--Bloomingdale's. I knew the brand name, and decided it would be incredibly hip and daring to shop there. I found a pair of jeans that fit mostly. They gapped a bit at the waist, but were a good length, and I could sit down comfortably. I almost fell down while paying $175 for them, but figured I'd only do it once in my life.

I gave those jeans away last year, as I was leaving Gulu, I think. My weight has gone up and down so much, thanks mostly to my African journeys. I was a size 4 after my Gulu stint, a 6 after a few months in Nairobi, a 12 this past April, and now I'm a 10. And because I really think this size makes sense for me, and intend to maintain it, I decided to have a pair of jeans tailor- made to fit me. I had about 5 pair hanging in my closet: a couple from the US that I'd had to have taken in at the waist and hemmed, and a couple of local purchases of inferior quality and uneasy fit. What if I had a pair of jeans that didn't need to be hemmed, didn't cut me off at the waist or gap up at the back, and made my thighs look toned and me feel dangerous?

It's possible, y'all, because I'm wearing the aforementioned article today. With a daring, draping fuschia blouse and the wide elastic and leather belt I bought on the street in Rio last year, and which always makes me feel like I actually have a smokin' waist. And here's the thing...I've logged about five admiring tushie glances so far, and the day is only half over! Now, I'd like to think that guys have been ogling my butt all along, but I just wasn't noticing it. There's just something about wearing the perfect jeans that makes you hyper aware. I am the Blue-Jean Packin' SHIZ-nit today!

Anyway, I highly recommend having your own denim denouement. And even though I don't look anything like the woman in the picture up top, it's okay, because NOBODY looks like the woman in the picture up top, except the woman in the picture up top. Get it????

Trust me on this, a pair of jeans designed just for you is the next best thing to feeling comfortable in your own skin. And when you got both things goin' on, look out, world!