Like Fine Wine

In "Hynde-sight," I should have known when I was rockin' out to Chrissie Hynde's "Middle of the Road" back in the day that girlfriend had some serious issues about getting older.

I loved that song, because it was such a hip way to confront the reality of cruising through the years. Eventually, you're forced to admit that you can't stay awake past 1 AM (unless you have perimenopause-related insomnia), or if you have kids, you can't be carefree and independent like you used to be. But I really didn't take the lyrics too seriously. I mean, Chrissie Hynde is one of the coolest female rockers ever. I always figured she'd be so chock full of pride and self-esteem in her musical accomplishments, she'd smack down the passing of years like President Obama did with the fly...and then keep on jammin'.

That's why it was deeply sad to read a recent quote from Chrissie, where she said she didn't mind getting older, she just didn't like getting "uglier." It breaks my heart to hear any woman equate getting old with getting ugly, because most of the truly beautiful people I've known in my life have been over the age of 50.

So kudos to Joyce Clark Hicks, my "Superior Mother, Wife, and Friend for Life" from Raleigh, North Carolina for reminding me that "Age Ain't Nothin' But a Number."

Yesterday, Joyce forwarded me a profound column written by Regina Brett. I'm assuming Brett is a former columnist for the Plain Dealer newspaper in Cleveland, Ohio, because she just turned 90 years old.

If God lets me live to be 90, I hope I'm still writing, and not drooling in a corner somewhere. But now that I'm half Brett's age, I can start fully embracing the incredible truth and sanity of the items below.

WORDS TO LIVE BY

By Regina Brett

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

25. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ''In five years, will this matter?"

26. Always choose life.

27. Forgive everyone everything.

28. What other people think of you is none of your business.

29. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.

30. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

31. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

32. Believe in miracles.

33. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

34. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

35. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

36. Your children get only one childhood.

37. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

38. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

39. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

40. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

41. The best is yet to come.

42. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

43. Yield.

44. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

Joyce, your email left off the 45th Life Lesson on Brett's list, so I'll supply one myself:

45: LAUGH YOUR ASS OFF AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE. And when you stop laughing, find something else to laugh about. Life is just too absurd most of the time, but you are blessed if you can laugh at yourself more than other people laugh at you, and if you can keep your sense of humor through the most difficult periods of your life.

I'm telling you, folks, this stuff isn't negotiable. Live by these rules, and you'll realize that about 3/4ths of the angst you're experiencing in your life is just a lot of sound and fury...signifying not a single damn thang.

So as Day 3 of the "Wait for My Soulmate" winds down, I'm thinking about how much I've learned in my 47 years, and how smart and tough and resilient I am. I figure whenever he shows up, he'll quickly rejoice in the knowledge that he's getting the best of me there is to offer.

And you can't put a pricetag on that, but you can definitely say like fine wine, we all get better with age.