Deconstructing Susan

You know, I'm tempted to just make a brief, sheepish reference to my earlier blogpost about Susan Boyle by saying,

"Never mind!"

So much for my projecting a canny level of seasoned self-awareness and innate confidence onto that poor woman. Apparently, The Talented Ms. Boyle was the quintessential deer in the headlights, and all the worldwide scrutiny and pressure finally broke her down to a mass of quivering nerve endings.

I felt so sorry for her this morning, as every news report on every TV and radio station led with the story of her ingnominious journey to a psychiatric facility yesterday, following her second place finish in the "Britain's Got Talent" competition. I suspect that even more than the constant harassment by the press, the meddling-cum-support from her handlers, and the expected amount of Byzantine performance anxiety, what finally drove Susan Boyle over the edge was the fear that she had disappointed all the family, friends and fans in her hometown.

Put yourself in her shoes...or, the "hideously unfashionable footwear" mentioned in all the early stories about her. Susan Boyle rang in 2009 living in a modest flat with her cats, singing at the occasional pub but generally living a lonely, uneventful life. 6 months later, she's known worldwide, she's having microphones shoved under her nose and being blinded by camera flashes wherever she goes, and she's reading and hearing herself being described not only as divinely talented, but with other colorful descriptors like the "Hairy Angel." That's a level of scrutiny and critique that 95 percent of the population simply could not withstand, no matter how much money and fantasy makeovers were being offered.

Eventually, Susan Boyle will be just fine. I hope. Once she's pulled herself back together, she'll probably make goo-gobs of money from book, movie and record deals. But I hope Susan is able to move forward on her own terms. And I hope she's able to figure out what those terms are, because I get the sneaking suspicion that as much as the Simon Cowells of the world wave their magic wand and make dreams come true for undiscovered talent, they will still get seriously paid whether a Susan Boyle wins a Grammy or fades to black as the most talented, "Village Crazy Cat Lady" in history.