"Going Once, Going Twice...."

Lately, you may have noticed that the blog has been completely devoid of my usual dose of rampant neuroticism. Mostly it's because I've been super busy, and somewhat scattered, as I try to figure out how the hell to actually make a difference at what I'm doing over here. It's also because I had such a blissful, relaxing experience during the Zanzibar journey that I haven't been as fascinated by the strange inner-workings of my hormone-addled brain.

But never fear, gentle readers, because things are about to get just as obsessively OCD as they ever were before. NFAND just would not be the same hypnotically hilarious read without me picking at every bleeding, throbbing psychic wound and pontificating about the supreme existential challenges of being a single middle-aged African American woman thousands of miles away from home.

So I'll throw y'all a bone by announcing that this afternoon, I'll be attending a charity "Bachelor Auction" in Nairobi, part of a segment that's being filmed for a local Cable variety program called "The Patricia Show." There's even an interesting story about why I'm going. Last December, during one of my usual rounds of aimless channel surfing, I saw a listing for the show and wondered who the heck Patricia was, and why she had her own show.

Turns out Patricia is a former big-time radio "personality" in Nairobi who took time off to have a baby and now has her own Cable show. She's this tall, striking Kenyan woman with cheekbones to die for, flawless chocolate skin and a killer British accent.

Ironically, just a few days after I stumbled across the show, I actually wound up meeting her in person as I drooled over some of the clothes she'd had custom-designed in a local boutique. I kept trying to get the owner to sell the stuff to me, or make me something just like it, when in walks Patricia, all regal and tall and skinny and making me feel like a bloated chimp.

After I gushed like an 8th grader for about 10 minutes about how ironic it was to be meeting her, we traded business cards and I left the shop thinking of all the lovely networking possibilities that lay in store. Then just a few weeks later, my friend Jackie landed a gig as a producer for Patricia's show. When they decided to do the Bachelor auction, Jackie conveniently dropped my name as a potential bidder....and the rest will soon be history.

I predict an extremely hilarious blogpost in the near future. I mean, let's face it...most of the guys will be in their 20's and 30's, I'm guessing, so there I'll sit, as old as a few of their mothers, bidding on a date with them....

YEE-HAW!!! PRINCESS RACHELLA IS BACK IN THE ABSURDITY SADDLE AGAIN!! RIDE 'EM, COWGIRL!!!!