I Spy With My Half-Blind Eye

You know, until about 2 hours ago, being 47 felt really smokin' hot.

I mean, I ain't tryin' to front, or nothin', but I KNOW I look good. I may feel like a soggy mass of Kleenex during half of each waking moment, but after I've mopped the sweat from my brow, I can still represent in the looks department.

But why, oh WHY did I have to have an eye exam during my lunch break today?? Even taking into consideration that the well-meaning young woman in the optical shop downtown was using Flinstones era tools, I am virtually "blind in one eye and cain't see out the other" these days.

Sure, half of what most optometrists are pushing is pure sales pitch, but there was no faking the concerned demeanor of this particular eyeball urchin, who kept saying, "Is THIS any better?? Are you SURE you can't see the letters clearly?"

Then she asked for my current glasses, which I only use for distance vision. I had told her I was having trouble focusing on road signs and such, and she offered to examine. "Your vision has changed a lot since these were made," she said. "I can see why you are having trouble."

Oh, good, I mumbled to myself. At least somebody can see. Bee YOTCH!

Anyway, the baby eye doc tried to sell me on some new lenses, which would cost about $100...probably half what I'd pay in the US. Still, I made a point of saying I'd "think about it," and stumbled blindly back out the door. Just like occasionally "forgetting" to take my blood pressure medication, I must jealously guard my self-image as a young woman by ignoring necessary adjustments for the passing of the years.

Look, I may have a massive stroke right before I walk in front of a bus one day soon, but it is better to LOOK good than to FEEL good, eh?

Cheers!