Salt, Grease and Sugar

Meet my three best friends these days...Salt, Grease and Sugar.

It is absolutely TRAGIC how giddy the sight of these two snack food items from home made me feel this afternoon!! Granted, that was mostly because I had just come from the doctor's office, where I'd almost groveled at her feet for help in ending the lingering remnants of madness and dysfunction that are the hallmarks of "The Change of Life."

You may have noticed I haven't written much about hot flashes and night sweats in recent months, because for the longest time, I wasn't having any. I was blissfully, deliriously symptom-free. I felt normal for so long, I forgot what feeling miserable was like!

But apparently, that vicious bitch called Fertility just won't stay gone. She showed up again a few months ago, after a 6 month absence, and it's like I've been trapped in a 2-month bout of PMS. Like, 2 months of the worse case I've EVER had. I'm tense, snappish, argumentative, and ready to either curse you out or wail like a lost 3-year-old at the mall if you look at me funny.

ALL THE TIME. Now, I realize a lot of this might be aggravated by the stress of starting my new journalism project. It's also October, which is one of my "tough months" each year, so maybe that's why. All I really knew yesterday, when I made an appointment with my local internist, is that I was near the end of my rope. And that rope is caked with salt, grease and sugar.

THESE are the only things that give me comfort these days. THESE are what make me smile and stop obsessing about who I can hiss at for being a complete idiot!!!! And the worst part of it is that I was lying on the couch the other day with the MacBook nestled on my bloated stomach, eating salted banana chips while working on my expense forms with the TV on for background "company," when a movie came on that completely "outed" me.

All is revealed in the next posting!